I took a couple of days off my blog to focus on reading around everyone else’s and ended up commenting on way more than the four suggested by the guys at Blogging 101. I can now see how people treat blogging as a full-time job. It takes time to cultivate a community and that process is definitely a worthwhile investment, but now I have a massive list of ideas for posts that will take forever to get through! Bad blogging community! I have enough on my plate without you lot firing off my creative juices all willy nilly. *wags finger in your face*
For today, I must redress a wrong by sharing the blog I wrote my least considered comment on. Pixie Dust Beach very thoughtfully shared three blog recommendations of her own that were all awesome and all I could think of to write was “Thank you for sharing these. Very cool blogs.” YAWN.
What I should have written was “Wow! These are all great but that third one was an epiphany. I’ve never been any good at knowing when to give up. Thanks so much for sharing it. Real food for thought.”
The bit that really got me was this part of Pixie’s summary of Kristen Lamb’s blog about learning when to quit (I’m getting all Blogception up in here. Just bear with me):
Quitting is often branded as the loser’s route. Quitters never succeed. Quitters don’t ever make it. Far from the truth, Kristen discusses how some successful writers today are where they are precisely because of them knowing when to quit.
I have so much trouble knowing when to cut my losses and quit. Once I have invested any energy into something I feel like I can’t let it go. Writing, craft projects, DIY projects, parties, mothers groups, toxic friends, clothes, toys – you name it. I’m always the last to leave, the last one holding on til the bitter end, way beyond the point where whatever it is was useful or enjoyable or even possible.
But then once it has passed the point of possibilities all I’m doing is wasting that energy, and then wasting extra energy feeling guilty for not putting more into it and seeing it through and then wasting EXTRA extra energy feeling wistful and regretful that it never worked out (my unfinished Masters thesis immediately springs to mind).
This is at the crux of all my hoarding and all the chaos in my brain. So much thinking about possible outcomes in the future and keeping options open and holding onto things “just in case.” So many things I’m only keeping for the pure fact that they spark a memory every time I stumble upon them that otherwise has no bearing on my life anymore. So much fear of loss and regret.
So much fear..
Whoa. We’ve moved from blogs within blogs to epiphanies within epiphanies now. I’ve never explicitly linked fear to these feelings before but there it is, squatting over everything and smirking at me right in the face. I just… wow. Writing has always been therapeutic for me but now I’m feeling like I should be paying you all by the hour.
Thanks for sharing, again, Pixie. Food for thought indeed.